Elwood on McDonald's!
by rachel laufer
Summary: And I would like a double cheeseburger, large milk, french fry and 100 chicken nuggets with honey mustard dipping sauce! When you can't go to McDonald's, nothing is better than humor!
1. The Night at the Pizza Place!

"I wish my mother had enough money to buy dinosaur chicken nuggets!" Buster would say as his brown hair had a gentle blow from the wind of the rainy and breezy weather as he walked home.

Earlier, Bitzi Baxter got into a fight with Buster's dad. The incident took place in a pizza restaurant when Bitzi started to discuss about how fat she was in her weight loss program.

"I gained 2 pounds in one week, even though I ate only 1000 calories a day and exercise 7 hours a day. It's not fair! I have those Oreo 100 calorie crisps for anybody who wants them!"

The fight involved throwing pepperoni pizza each other, Bitzi blowing a raspberry into Dad's neck, a fat toddler throwing his chicken tender with waffle fries and broccoli meal and chocolate milk directly into Dad's face, another plump child hogging down her grilled cheese and mozzarella sticks dipped in tomato sauce with her green beans and strawberry milk as a dish of mashed potatoes and a dish of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream with fudge, gummy bears, peanut butter sauce and a cherry on top covered her face, therefore ending the fight.

Buster went home, but his mother wasn't there. But Buster saw a box of mushroom, broccoli and extra cheese pizza waiting for him. Yum!

Feel Hungry For More?


	2. Arthur's Nachos!

Arthur came off the bus and ran into the house.

His day was fine, except for his failed math test. Arthur wanted something to eat, his nasty school lunch comprised of tuna and macaroni salad, the 40+ ingredient pizza rolls, strawberry ice cream with gummy worms, and 'girly' strawberry milk was so disgusting Arthur wasn't satisfied with what should have been a healthy and hearty meal.

So Arthur went to the kitchen to make himself an american-mexican food that his friends had a severe addiction to: NACHOS!

"I'm gonna go to the fridge to get my american singles out like I have the obsession of a mouse! I don't care if I get constipated! Squeak! Squeak! You can't stop me!" Arthur said as he grabbed the bag of processed orange cheese in individual packets. Arthur opened the plastic packages, tore the cheese product into shreds into a bowl, and placed the bowl in the microwave at 5 minutes.

"I'm gonna take every poor little triangle chip out of that bag! I love my precious corn chips with cheap nacho cheese!" Arthur grabbed his bag of tortilla chips off the top shelf of the kitchen.

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

"MY NACHO CHEESE!" Arthur's eyes popped out at what he calls a glorious sight! His cheese product melted in the microwave without burning!

Arthur dumped the entire bag of tortilla chips into the cheese bowl, spilling chips in the process. Arthur hogged down the entire bowl of nachos!

Then he went to the fridge to got milk and drank it to wash down a rather unhealthy but addictive snack.


	3. Don't Eat That!

D.W. was at the playground when she started to feel hungry.

"I wonder if my mom is making grilled cheese sandwiches! My stomach's growling like a bear who got sick from living off of corn flakes cereal and chocolate syrup milk!" D.W. pouted as she lied herself down on the bench.

Tommy was sleeping underneath a tree when he heard D.W.'s statement. Tommy woke up and walked up to her.

"Grilled cheese is a misnomer! You FRY the sandwich in a pan with butter, not on the grill! You must be nuts!"

"Tommy, don't eat that poison ivy on the fence!" D.W. yelled at the top of her lungs as Tommy was two feet away from the fence. He licked the poison ivy.

A few seconds later, Tommy got a rash on his tongue and his mouth held a pool of saliva.

Then Tommy was two feet away from the fence, which was a haven for poison ivy and vines, and D.W. had a disgusting idea.

"Tommy, take your shoes off!" And Tommy did that.

"Now, your stinky socks that haven't went in the wash for two weeks!" Tommy did that without refusal.

Tommy laid down on his back, and D.W. had a face as if she smelled a delicious cherry cake baked in an oven. If you have an upset stomach, get out your empty Lucky Charms cereal box and use it as a barf bag. Or, just read something else.

"What kind of jam can't you find in the grocery store?"

"Vanilla jam? Egg jam? Burger jam? D.W., I need your help!"

D.W. lifted Tommy's left foot. (because the left is the side most people don't use as much as their right side, so it feels more ticklish on the left foot than the right. Get it?)

D.W. glanced at Tommy's foot, all dirty and have not been washed for a while, those five little toes on top of everybody's foot, and toenails.

Underneath Tommy's toenail on his big toe, was something tiny, yet nasty. It smelled like old expired cheese, and had a nasty yellow gold color.

But what would it taste like? D.W. placed her tongue on the toenail. Tasted Good! Just like the premium cheese at your local pizzeria or Italian market!

"Toe Jam!" D.W. answered! "You are so gross!" Tommy yelled at D.W. as he ran off barefoot onto the sidewalk to go home.


End file.
